#FAMILYOVEREVERYTHING

Unlike the Westernized family life, my family is pretty much everybody and their mamas. I assume that is not entirely the same thing in 3 out of millions of families around the world. Not unless, some extended families in the world presumably turns a blind eye on their family members on purpose, or this type of family relation is not entirely important to one who may only consider immediate family as family. 

We all have that one family member who loves to tickle our minds with the monumental histories about a strong family. By means of that, he or she may overly boast, "Our family is a very very big family in honor, strength, matai titles, more government workers and historical warrior stories. We are also a very caring family." 

Sure, because no one has to know about the dishes shattering in the sink out back when the other family members joins us for dinner. No one also has to know about the day we pull hairs and call each other names. Get it straight, our family is a very lovey dovey family and no one has to know about the rest. 

With regards to all the beautiful things that knits a perfect family, the hidden brawls and same old #ghetto rock-throwing sessions are never a surprise. There is name calling, brawls, fights over lands and titles and continuous disagreements. Some of these wild events are explicitly imprinted in my recent novel (Lovefolds of Our Upbringing Book .) What's questionable to most people about the continuous rampage between families is already a familiar topic to many. Here are several reasons how #FamilyOverEverything changes quickly into #FamilyWhat?: 

1. Fa'alavelave's 

    Some say that the only time they'll see a family member is when a cousin, brother or long distance relative needs something or when things happen. Faalavelave's or special events for Samoan families are very common. Loved ones bring monies and fine mats over to a fa'alavelave as a family tradition or covenant. A family member may give more in one fa'alavelave, and then dialogue over what was given. And it's never a fa'alavelave until every knows about the $500, 100 fine mats and hard mats used by the family in the guest house the fa'alavelave falls on. When conflicts occur, the whole village will know about it after outbursts and bickering on who gave more, who didn't and who banked on the rest. 

2. Competition 

    You probably have that type of family where everyone wants to brag about their child becoming a Valedictorian, the prettiest or possibly be going to Malua or marrying a Piula reverend in the future. You're not alone. Every family has to have that gene, that rallies around shining the dull, on what wasn't accomplished, to make one look more better than the others. The children, who has no idea, what's going on unfortunately just nods along in confusion during the #MineMoBettah session.

3. Territorial 

You ever had a time when you're picking up leaves and cleaning up an area, or even cut the wrong clusters off a banana tree then all of a sudden you get a warning letter from Samoan Affairs over a complaint from your own family member? I mean, you can smell the curry chicken and shoyu turkey tails they make every other day next door. You can even hear their toilet flush, yet they managed to drive to Samoan Affairs to file a territorial complaint about leaves the wind blew to your front door. It happens in every family. To some, they would much rather have someone type up a letter on their behalf, in case they can't get a salt, banana, onion or a cigarette the next time they knock on your door for some. 

4. Titles

 In extended families, a title is the right of every one in each family circles. What's complicated about it is that everyone has a "say" or "nay" about a title. They can petition to remove a title, agree or grant a title. As long as that right exists in the blood types, the process in finding a chief for the family will take its time as long as the court tolerates the ongoing family riots in between circles of #UsuPai #FaaeeLeGafa #Lafai. When a title is discussed, the whole family has to agree to it before anything. Regardless of how close knitted a family tree is, when it comes to the family constitution in seeking a person suitable for a title, that precious hashtag, #FamilyOverEverything is out the window. It divides family in little elites on who is for and who is against. The rival never calms until they hug and reunite at a family reunion like nothing happened. 

5. Birthrights 

   Not all families were born in the same place. A young lady from a family may marry a man from another village, but her children are still entitled to rights in her family. For instance, my grandmother was born in American Samoa, my grandfather is from Western Samoa. Her children were born in Western Samoa. Her children later returned on her behalf to American Samoa. There are also relatives who migrated to the United States for careers and education. They raised a family, and their children later returned to their homelands. Events occurring in #1 and #3 leads to name calling for #5 such as: You were born in Upolu, you were born in Tutuila, hey, you're from America, you don't peel banana there! All in that same package. 

6. Blood Type Universal 

  When it comes to #1, no one will ever claim that you're adopted, until either #3, #4 and #5 happens. Some family members are adopted or were raised up by mothers and fathers out of true love for a child. When mothers and fathers pass on, they leave behind their adopted loved ones with a chief title and entrusting them to take care of family. To those who turns out to be #3 about everything, they'll always send vibes about adoption and how one is not family and will never be family regardless of their service to #1 and #4. 

These reasons always exhibit an endless void in families. It precedes an omen of wrongs until one has to brag to a stranger about how powerful or high his or her family is. The wrongs are always tossed in the back burner when in pressure among others. Even though one may not be in speaking terms with that family member, the family image and pride is highly conducive to that great act. There could be other things that always makes a family imperfect, until #1 happens or a loved one dies. No matter what happens, family is always family. There will be days of peace and days of Rambo and Arnold Schwarzenegger. 

Lovefolds of Our Upbringing

   I know you're growing curious as to who the heck this is out of all the Samoan writers and authors who has made the headlines and monumental best-selling list. I know. I felt the same way when I first discovered Kindle online and some South Pacific writers. When I read about Daniel and Leila, I was very well locked into my room for hours. Must I add, I went days correcting my husband several times about the sudden glitch in the system and error in my birth certificate. "Ummm I beg to differ, it's Leila, not Lynn!" 

I love Lani Young, Sia Figiel and Logo Filloon and their talented work. I give them full credit and respect for opening more windows to the world to see the capacity of growing talents in our archipelagos. The world has not only discovered talented people in both Samoan islands, but have also got a chance to see more behind the dots on the map. Humbly, I am just a rambunctious soul who fathoms life, Samoa, my korean soap operas, pinterest crafts, pisupo (corned beef), flip flops and Five Stars. I am from Lauli'i, American Samoa and my roots originated from Samoa, Savaii, the Manu'a Islands and the waves of immigrants from China who settled in Falealili. There you have it, I'm full blooded Samoan and not a #LivalivaAsoLeAiSeTaimiu 

I began writing Lovefolds of Our Upbringing (This Book Here ), when I was in 3rd grade. My journals and diaries since then are still with me presently. I still vaguely recall the many times I made attempts to publish this book. I paused every day over doubts and mixed emotions if what I was writing would be something my readers would relish in a world fixed upon fiction prose of demi gods and mythology mortals as well as other topics. 

When the doubts accumulated, I began to appraise train of thoughts that many people would ponder anxieties upon at the glance or thought of uncertainty.  I started out by creating my own genre for my chosen audience with assurance (#tooshua) that if at anytime in a cloud of doubts, my fierce reaction would be to keep going even if a declination from any publishing company motivates me to jump over the bridge or #pugaIlefreeway. 

    
Subsequently, I chose an influential topic to exhibit a positive message for younger generations with a culture-centered setting to inspire readers. Children leave home upon completion of high school for military careers, off-island opportunities and education abroad. Many things happen from: rapid changes upon transitioning from a small island to big cities and increased influence of technology and other factors, which contributes to reclusive habits.  This type of bearing isolates one from the normalcy of taking care of parents and the foundation they fostered under to always remember family, as well as the beginning.  Many may have forgotten that and have immune to the notion of other practices by which at a certain age, when a child ascends to the legal 18, they are no longer obliged to a parent even their consent. 

     
The way life works now is nothing compared to when I was growing up in the Samoan Islands. It is a familiar background to many. Yet for some, they may surprisingly read through the unfamiliar setting of Lovefolds. It creates a culture shock for many, while some may customarily share the relatable and solitary norms practised by all Samoan families. 

I portrayed a setting people would attract to and reflect to the beginning. I also elaborated more on the indisputable based from experience and some of the encounters witnessed in neighborliness villages with others, families and associates as envisioned in this fiction book.

The message that the "Lovefolds of Our Upbringing" book (Read Reviews here) prominently shares, does spin a charismatic upbringing for many. The book grasped curiosity about the life in Samoa for people who are unfamiliar with the Samoan culture, and the beauty of the practices and norms that its people embrace.

The first draft was transferred over from scratch. It was in scribbles on a spiraled "Winston Churchill" notebook my good friend Edith sent me. An array of "pay-it forward" viral statuses on facebook earned myself a notebook. That book was later filled with characters of a mother, father, their 11 children and the humble upbringing in Samoa as well as extended families. 

This compelling story evokes a compendium of journalism perspectives from all characters in the family and their upbringing- from waking up in the morning to a fixed schedule of chores, the bond between parents and their children,family prayers and recaps, the norm of growing up under the dogma and notion of the Samoan culture founded under "God before everything." 

This book also exhibits a fine and vigorous background, and a grotesque of the skirmishing encounters each characters endured and braced through. If you have not experienced riding on a Samoan rollercoaster yet, prepare yourself now for a real Samoan rollercoaster brawl!

More reviews and updates for Molioleava books can be found on My "Molioleava Books" Facebook Page. Much alofas! 

Lynn Pulou-Alaimalo
Author of Molioleava & Lovefolds of Our Upbringing